Janie forgets Fred’s birthday

Season 3, episode 8. 22nd - 26th May 1882. In back and forth in the run up to Fred’s return to Sheffield, Fred has been prodding Janie about her memory and for good reason - Janie is suddenly faced with the realisation that her memory isn’t her strong point. We  we also have a little look at the ubiquity of the horse in the Victorian era.
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Writen and produced by Ingrid Birchell Hughes

Transcript

[Intro]
Welcome back to My Love Letter Time Machine, Hi, I’m Ingrid Birchell Hughes, and I’m serialising the love letters of my great great Grandparents, Fred Shepherd and Janie Warburton. Travel 140 years back in time with me now where we take a look at Victorian history through their eyes and today Janie suddenly realises that’s she’s completely forgotten Fred’s birthday, and we also have a little look at the ubiquity of the horse in the Victorian era.

[Janie forgets Fred’s birthday]
As Janie and Fred might say, I have a nice long one for you today as we read their back and forth in the run up to Fred’s return to Sheffield. You might recall from last time that Fred had been prodding Janie about her memory and it seems he was making a point - I’m not sure whether this was a gentle prod or a passive aggressive one - but Janie is suddenly faced with the realisation that her memory isn’t her strong point:

Handsworth 
May 22nd 1882

My own darling Fred
You don’t know how sorry I am, I did not remember your birthday last Tuesday, I have felt so miserable since yesterday, your Mother said she had sent you a letter, + I above all persons to forget it. If it is not too late now, I wish you may live to enjoy a many happy birthdays. You will spend the next with me darling, I shall very likely be your wife then - shan’t I love? We will have a plum pudding to celebrate it then. You’ll forgive me once more darling I know how disappointed you would feel, + love me quite as much won’t you? What can I buy I have not the slightest idea what to get for you, tell me what you would like in your next letter. 

I went to school yesterday morning + to church, in the afternoon down to your house, your Mother looks a deal better than when I was down last, all the rest are quite well. Walter + Jane came up after tea + little Jinnie Jane has got a very bad cold. Jinnie does get a little chatterbox, she is a sharp child. We must go down to see them this Whitsuntide or you will commit a grave offence. I am housekeeper this afternoon. (John + Louisa brought me into Handsworth last night it was a little after ten)

Mother has gone to Sheffield, our Emma has gone to Annie Wortleys to tea, + father + our John are at Lawyer Smith’s sale, he has gone to live at Ottley[sic] near Leeds, so they are selling the things they don’t want to keep. 

I wish I had you to talk to me a bit this afternoon darling. I shall have you very soon, I do wish it was next Saturday love, I do want to see you.

Little Walter was singing for us last night, he has a sweet voice.

I saw the pigs they are nice ones, one is very much bigger than the other. The arbour looks very nice for us next Sunday. I hope you will like the card I have sent you it is the best I could get at Handsworth.

Father + Mother are in pretty good health, my cold is not quite better yet. I will give you another letter to morrow after I receive yours. I have to go + see about tea now, I wish I was getting it ready for you love. 
I remain always my husband
Your loving true + faithful
Wife till death us do part
Janie

Albert Terrace Linthorpe Road Middlesbrough
May 23rd 1882.

My own darling Janie,
I received your letter this morning , but I expected to receive an answer to the one I wrote on Sunday. We were rather late in getting down to the Post Office, (being father away from it now,) still as we were only about a minute after the time I fully expected it would go + am sorry that you did not get it on Monday morning.

With respect to any birthday - must confess I was rather disappointed at not — receiving the usual good wishes from you, especially as you wrote to me on the 15th + 16th + could easily have inserted them. Of course I could not do otherwise than come to the conclusion that you had forgot. I did not like to think that you had knowingly omitted them. Yet I scarcely know what to think when you said in your last letter that your memory was improving.

As you are aware I received one from home full of good wishes. It is very consoling to thing that one is not entirely “out of mind” when “out of sight”, + I did think that you gave a thought to me occasionally. I suppose I felt it more being so far away. However that is past now.

I thank you very much love for the card + your good wishes, I like the card very much but one less expensive would have done just as well seeing that it is so long after the date.

I don’t really want you to buy me anything, + have not the least idea what to tell you, I only wanted your thoughtful kindness I shall spend the next with you darling + will see that you don’t forget then, + we will have the plum pudding. 

I do forgive you darling, I cannot help it loving you as I do; but I should like you to celebrate this habit a little more I believe I have said something to this effect before, + I don’t want to preach a sermon.

I am glad to hear that you went down to our house on Sunday love, I wish I could have take you home as of old. 

We shall no doubt have an opportunity of sitting in the arbor next week. Have you promised to go down next Sunday? How do you propose we shall spend the time love have you thought about it?

I am very sorry to hear that your cold is not better yet love, have you taken anything for it? I think colds are the things you should guard against most.

I wish it was my tea you were going to get ready wifie, for I need your attention so much. I am afraid I am not so well as I was - as I don’t feel quite so light hearted or hopeful as I have done. I expect it is one of the old fits of despondency, with not having you to cheer me out of it. I shall soon see you my darling + then it will all go - for when I am with you all doubts vanish + care is not thought of.

I will finish this tomorrow love after receiving yours, + it is now after 12 o’clock. So I will wish you a loving goodnight + away to my virtuous bachelor’s couch. (x)

[continued] May 24th 1882

My darling
I was very disappointed at not receiving a letter from you this morning, especially as you promised to write yesterday.

When night came + still no letter I have begun to think that the letter must have miscarried. + if so that you have not yet received it. I sincerely hope that you have got it by this time love, because our letters are such that it would scarcely be pleasant for others to read.

You will write for Friday my darling, telling me if you have got it, if you have not I will make enquiries at the Post Office here.

Not long ago one of Alvey’s got lost somehow, + he never recovered it, I should not like mine to be so because it was a great effort + covered four sheets. 

They have altered the time of receiving letters here from 8 to 10 pm, so that I can now get the evening delivery before the post goes out again. If a letter is posted in Sheffield before 10 in the morning, it is delivered here in the evening.

We got off just after seven to night - Mr Cooper has gone to Manchester, Preston + Barrow until Friday morning, + I have to keep up the dignity fo the N.E.S. Co (Limited).

We shall have done early tomorrow night as I cut the letters short when I have to dictate them (we have had over 50 today).

I do wish you were here darling, I have not got over the loneliness yet even. I feel only half myself away from you - my better half.

There seems to be a lot of courting done here, + I feel flute envious when I cannot do likewise. But I shall try to make up for it next week wifie — oh I do wish it was here so much. But it only wants three days love, + then you will be in my arms + I in yours. I can almost imagine I can feel your arms round my neck darling (but it is not so.) I wish it was.

How have you arranged about your Williams love? Shall we go there at all + if so, will it be Saturday or Monday? Are they still thinking of going to London? I feel as though I should like to be alone with you all the time darling. Do you think we should get tired of one another? I think not.

Our lodgings are very pleasant so far love, I have nothing to complain of except the bed which is not so soft as I would like. It is like living out in the country compared to Church Street. Did you tell my mother how it was I shifted love, because I have not told them yet.

Please write for Friday darling if only a few lines.

I am, my darling Wife
Your loving true + faithful husband
Fred

Fred’s missing letter did eventually turn up which I’m including next out of context here so that Janie’s response makes sense. In it he goes into detail about his move and mentions that he and his fellow lodgers made use of a dray to transport all their belongings.

It was this little detail that suddenly reminded me that of course Fred and his mates wouldn’t have been able just to get a ‘man with a van’ they’d have had to get a man with a horse, this being still the age of horse transportation. 

While the steam train had become fully integrated by the 1880s, the back bone of transport for people and goods was by horse. Wealthy people owned carriages, and goods were delivered by horse and cart. We know Janie would sometimes ride the horse-drawn tram from Sheffield up to Darnall if she missed the train. And while goods would arrive by train to the centre of cities, they would still have to be taken on to their final destinations on an assortment of horse drawn wagons, carts and drays. There were hundreds of thousands of professional haulage workers and carters in the UK. Pickfords removals, still a household name in the UK, actually started in 1695 and by end of the 19thC owned over four thousand horses to facilitate their business. Entire industries surrounded the use of the horse, coaching inns with stabling, Farriers and veterinarians, horse markets and livestock fairs, cart and wagon makers, harness and livery makers. It was a massive network of associated activity. Even publicans would cater specifically towards the workers in the haulage trade, as this lovely bit of detail from Robert Robert’s ‘The Classic Slum’ illustrates: 

“Local Carters working in the city warehouses seldom took food with them. Public houses, avid for trade, put on some kind of a free snack with their 1 1/2 pence Carters pints.  Certain pubs went further and supplied potato pie, cheese and pickles, a pint of beer and a piece of thick twist tobacco – all for 4 1/2 pence. A carter had to prove his bona fides, though, by bearing a whip in hand or around his neck.”

I’m of an age where I can just remember the last gasps of the horse drawn era - as a very young child in London in 1970 - road sweepers still used horse drawn vehicles, and I was childishly fascinated by the whole performance of giving a horse its lunch with a nose bag.  There were also the rag and bone men who showed up driving their horse and cart announcing their arrival with a holler down the street, the cry of ‘Rag and Bone’  having mutated to something that was more a rhythmic wail, all the consonants having fallen off through decades of repetition.

But back in the 1880s the streets of every major city and town would have been filled with horses and the vehicles they drew, to say nothing of the manure that they deposited in the street. Crossing the road with a long skirt doesn’t really bear thinking about. Cities would employ sweepers overnight to remove the manure from busy streets. And it wasn’t just manure that was left in the street. Life for these horses was brutal and short, the sight of a dead horse, the poor thing having died on the job, was pretty common and would be left by the side of the road until it could be taken away by the knackers man, to then be turned into pet food or rendered down into various by-products like glue, gelatine and bone meal.  

But back to the task of moving lodgings. I found this 1883 advertisement in the Daily Gazette for Middlesbrough reads: “Furniture Removed, by road or rail, in special lock-up vans; practical men employed; terms moderate. Address C. Newton, Bridge Road Stockton.” However Fred and company are more likely to have found a carter rather than professional removers, perhaps for the price of a beer. They loaded it themselves and no doubt then clambered in on top of their belongings or the back of the cart to be transported to the new address. 

By the way we also get a return to some sexual discussion. It’s not explicit but the Victorian euphemisms are back in force. 

Albert Terrace Linthorpe Road Middlesbrough
[undated, prob 20th May 1882]

My own darling Wife
I received your loving letter this morning for which I thank you very much, I was afraid that I should be disappointed as the postman was long after his usual time. But you have never disappointed me on Sundays my darling, for which I am grateful I think after Whitsuntide I shall not have so much work to do.

The board meetings occur on the third Thursday in every month, when the directors meet to pass resolutions + contracts. These minutes or resolutions have to be all copied into the minute book and copies of them sent to each of the directors who are not present at the meeting so that we have plenty of work both before and after the meetings. 

I wish you could have packed my things darling, you would've done it so much better than I should. As it was I had not sufficient accommodation for everything and have left a pair of trousers,a coat, shirt + hat etc at Mrs Gordon's which I shall have to bring up by easy stages we had quite a dray Full of luggage (something like Mrs browns) 4 trunks, 2 portmanteaus, 4 bags etc it was a great sight.

I am quite content to spend a quiet Whitsuntide darling, indeed I think I should like nothing better than to be with you every bit of the time. It would be happiness indeed then.

I am glad to hear that you have got over the usual monthly darling, but sorry you had to suffer so much wifie. Was it not late love? I thought it would have been about last Sunday being four weeks from the last, should it be exactly 4 weeks or is it a month say 30 days? If it is painful darling don't you think it would be better to take something for it? I think it says something about it in your “advice to a wife”?  When you are my wife darling I think I shall insist on this, because as far as I know it is almost impossible for a woman to conceive if she is not regular. However I suppose you know better than I do upon that subject love.

I am sorry that you did not get down to our house love, being so busy on Friday, but I understood from the letter I received on Friday that you were going down on the Thursday night. Were you busy that night too love?

Do you ever doubt my love for you darling, that you asked so pointedly? I could never neglect you my darling, that is something too awful to contemplate love. I am glad that you love me as much as ever wifey. I like you to say that, it is nice from you.

I wish you could push the days on a bit my darling, I am all impatience as you are but there is one day less even now since you wrote your letter and it only wants six now darling, + then bliss (where?) not on a wall I hope. 

We have got to our new lodgings darling, but so far I can scarcely tell whether we should be comfortable or not, in any case I hope I shan't have to change again until I change for good with you my own darling little wife, I am “not a bit” afraid of taking you on trial for life darling, if you will only be good + do as I tell you. I know you will do your very best love to make me happy, + I feel quite sure you will succeed, but I will help you darling as much as ever I can, + I am confident that if we work together as we have done so far darling, we shall be happy + I hope prosperous. Of course you are well aware that it is necessary to both work together darling, or else things get wrong. Without your assistance I think I should be nothing. Even in our attempts at mutual bliss + connubial enjoyment, I was not successful until you gave me your valuable assistance.

At the mention of connubial bliss I feel the usual tightness in my trousers, but unfortunately you can't feel + prove this for yourself, but you will do so darling no doubt won't you love? I felt that after our love had proved itself as strong as to enable us to consummate our bliss, that we were then really married wifie + that nothing can step between us now, because we were + are wedded to each other.

We have yet to complete the ceremony by me putting your finger in the ring. (you before have put my big finger in the ring) which I hope will be soon.

Don't you feel afraid of taking me on trial for life love? As I can assure I have not wasted away in that particular.

Our new lodgings are very pleasantly situated we live in the front room which is large. We have a field directly in front and an extensive view of the back premises of some houses some distance away. Our landlady seems a very nice woman and will no doubt make us comfortable. The bed is not quite as soft as I should like, but I expect I shall get used to that. I don't expect to be really comfortable in the bed until you are there with me darling, as I have pleasant and vivid recollections of snatches of happiness at Morecambe. Oh my darling I shall never forget that time and how nice it was to have you with me in bed.

To return to the lodgings, we are only about a minutes walk from the park entrance (it is just behind our house) and it looked beautiful this morning, and I did so wish that you could be there with me darling. The lilacs are all in bloom and smell so sweet. Taking things as they stand, on the w(hole) I think we have made a good move in changing our residence. We have also a piano in the room and a couch. I appreciate the couch after the torture I suffered on the small sofas at the other place.

My feet were about a foot over the sofa arm when I laid down.

I am afraid I shall have to give up soon as I am beginning to write bad, + you will not be able to read it. I always start the first page very nice and then [unreadable - otherwise?]

I wish I could have had our usual Saturday night walk last night love. I[t] would have been so nice.

I went down to Redcar about the house yesterday + then walked to Saltburn and back as before. It was splendid, I do [wish?] I could take you just now. When we are married you see love, the days will not be as long. (But the nights will be longer I suppose so that we shall make up for it that way).

I am glad to hear that your memory has improved love, I don't think it has, as I will explain at Whitsuntide.

I am glad to hear that Handsworth are so successful at Cricket. Does your John play? Do they play anybody on Whitmonday? I have not played at all yet, both Redcar + Middlesbro have asked me to join but I have not done so.

I wish the next 6 days would go love. I am longing to see you + kiss you + then you say you love me. + remain
your loving, true + faithful 
husband 
Fred

Handsworth 
May 26th 1882

My own darling Husband
I was pleased to receive your letter this morning. I will now answer your Tuesday letter and I was unable to to answer it fully yesterday.

Yours would be a great shift from Mrs Gordons, Mrs Brown’s luggage would be nothing to it, Wasn’t Mrs Gordon sorry to see you all going. I think she will found out she has made a mistake to let you go.

The usual monthly was late, it should be exactly four weeks. I will look in the advice book + take something next time if I am not better. I never doubt your love darling I always feel sure of that. The bliss must certainly not be on a wall. 

I hope you will be comfortable in your new lodgings, until you take me darling for better or for worse it is very tiresome for you to change just when you got to know the people. I am glad you do not feel afraid of taking me on trial for life, I thought you would not mind, I will be so good, + do as you tell me did you say, love, I’ll see about that, I do love you my darling. I know it is necessary for both to work together, we shall do love, I am sure we shall be happy. I am glad you think my valuable assistance of use to you even in our mutual bliss + connubial enjoyment. I hope the buttons didn’t give way when you felt the tightness in your trousers. I feel just like you darling that when our love had proved so strong not to enable us to consummate our bliss, that we were married + nothing can step in to part us, we are wedded to each other, we have yet to complete the ceremony with the ring. You bad lad. I do not feel very much afraid of taking you on trial for life, even thought you have not wasted away in that particular. 

I am glad your lodgings are so nicely situated. I am sorry your bed is not very comfortable, I am glad you think I shall be a good bedfellow. It was a happy week at Morecambe, it was nice to be with you in bed. I shall snoozle [sic] up to you + put my cold feet on you in Winter. We shall never forget that delightful week, I was happy with you darling. 

I wish I could be with you to look at the Park in the mornings love + to smell the lilacs it would be delightful when we are together love. We will make up for lost time it will be so nice darling to get my work done + have tea ready for you when you come home tired + to cheer you + chase all the shadows away. 

I am glad you have got a couch in your room big enough for you, it would torture you to have your feet hanging about a foot over the arm. I wish I could have gone to Redcar last Saturday with you, it is a treat in store for me when we are married.

Our John does not play at cricket much, he plays sometime of practise nights but not in the matches. I have not heard him say they are going to play anybody on WhitMonday, they play Darnall second eleven on Saturday.

Only two more days then shall see you + kiss you I wish I could just this minute.

I will now answer this mornings, they must close very punctual to be to a minute after time, I was rather disappointed that I did not get it on the Monday. 

I am sorry about your birthday I will talk to you about it when you come, the card cost sixpence love so it was not very expensive. I hope it will be lesson to me I will try to cultivate my memory more.

I did not promise to go to your house next Sunday but I think they will expect us, your clematis was grown on the arbor. I have thought about how we should spend some of the time I thought we would go to our William’s on Saturday night, if your train is punctual we should get up there by soon after six + try to catch the 8 train to Attercliffe. Polly will be quite disappointed if we did not go.

I think my cold is about better I have a taken something for it love. I am sorry you do not feel very well darling I wish I was with you to attend to you + chase the old fit of despondency away. I felt in that way myself yesterday, but we must not get downhearted must we love? That will never do, so we must cheer up + be brave darling. We shall be together very soon now, I wish I could have received your loving good night but only two day + then I shall, Oh darling I do love you + I shall tell you so when you come + mean it. 

I was very sorry to disappoint you yesterday, I really could not help it I always write if I can possibly because love it give me as much pleasure to write to you as it does to you in receiving them, I got yours all right love it would not be pleasant to get any of ours lost. 

I am glad you got off rather earlier seven is plenty late enough, I am afraid you have been working too hard lately + knocked yourself up, it is too much to work until ten + eleven. I should like to see how dignified you are now love in your dignity of the N.E.S.C. Limited. I suppose you will look something awful, love, you will have to put a determined look + strut about + show them you are master, you won’t though I know, you will let them know you are master without showing it + be your dear old self + my darling husband. I am glad you acknowledge I am the best half. I am sorry you can’t even court me love as there is some courting over there, I am sure I feel quite envious when I see a couple go by we shall make up for it next week. 

Polly’s sister is coming on the Monday so they are not going to day [tonight? to town?] I don’t think we shall get tired of each other in a lifetime. I told your mother how it was you had left past time
I remain always
your loving true + faithful 
Wife Janie

Continued 
May 26th 1882 

My own darling Husband

Only another day, then bliss, it will be pleasurable to have near me again love. I could not sleep last night for thinking about you. I shall be at the station to meet you, on the side that you come in at, past time

Your loving true + faithful 
Wife Janie 

Judging by the comments in Fred’s next letter I am wondering if another letter of Janie’s has gone missing, that seems to have included update about her cousin Maria Staniforth, and possibly some frustration with Emma and her use of language. We’ll just have to piece together what we can from Fred’s response:


Albert Terrace Linthorpe Road Middlesbrough
[undated 25th May?]

My own darling Wife
I was very pleased to receive your letter this morning for the reason I gave in the letter you would receive this morning. I was so glad to know that you had got it, for it is very unsatisfactory to have letter knocking about the world, especially ours love.

I am sorry that you had to go to Sheffield because it debarred me from having a long letter from you, + it is such a long time since I had a good long letter from you love, + you forget to answer my questions.

It seems that John Meays + Miss Liversidge [sp?] are still together. If you remember Mrs Meays was rather doubtful about it when we were there love.

I am sorry to hear that Maria has been unfortunate over Willie Craven. But I don’t quite see why he came to see her after his marriage. Did she not know of it? I think he is very foolish in marrying his deceased wife’s sister, because it is no marriage according to the law, + the children of any result will be illegitimate. The Craven’s seem rather unfortunate in their marriages I think. Was he really engaged to Maria or was he only tifling with her. I never thought he would marry her love, + believe I said so to you some time ago.

I don’t believe in marrying like that - I know I shouldn’t like to marry my wife’s sister darling.

You must be careful not not [sic] to give too forcible expressions to your opinions love, when you go with them to buy the furniture, or they will perhaps not like it, especially if you persuade them to buy anything + they afterwards dislike it, they would heap blessings up your devoted head.

I wish you were going before Whitsuntide love, + then you could tell me how the things run. But in any case it will be valuable experience for you wifie, which you will no doubt profit by to our benefit. 

I expect I shall come by the usual train darling, I wish it was on the road now love, I do so want to kiss you it seem an age since I had one. But we will have a thousand when I do come. I am counting the hours to our meeting wifie.

Bear the discomfort a little longer darling, I will take you away as soon as I can, for I am as desirous as you that you should be away from them. Cannot your William do anything with her love, I am surprised that any woman calling herself respectable should use such language, but I will not pain you with my opinions darling. 

I will now go again to my “ virtuous couch” + dream of you. We have had rainy weather this week - I hope it will be fine next week darling, but it will not matter much as if we are together we shall be happy.

May 28th 1882

My own darling
I was very pleased to receive your loving letter this morning, such letters as this one does me good wifie, they are so brave + hopeful, I always feel better after reading them. I don’t think our lad is as pleased as I am, because owing to the postman being later where we are now - he has to fetch them.

The buttons did not give way love the other night, but I should not be surprised if they do tomorrow night, but you wifie have the remedy darling, which I think you will use when you see the necessity + opportunity offers.

I shall not have anything to do with your cold feet wifie, but I don’t expect you will be very cold when I have finished with you, at least I know I shant.

With regard to the holidays I intended coming back by the night train at 1.46 on Tuesday night but Mr Cooper says I can come by the usual train, which of course I shall do.

I am quite agreeable to go up to your William’s love on the Saturday night. It would be better so for then I should get tea earlier as I don’t think I shall have much time to get dinner.

I am pleased to hear that your cold is better darling, for it pains me to hear that you are not well at any time. 

Oh my darling, another day + then I shall be with you. I shall be quite willing to hear you say you love me wifie, + shall expect to hear you say it, which I will as willingly return, for I do love you my own darling, more than ever.

You would not have seen any difference love, in my dignity more than usual, even though I had the cares + responsibilities fo the N. E. Steel Co (Limited) on my devoted head. There’s not a doubt about my being master, but as you say, I don’t show it much. The time to show it darling, will be when we are married + then you must expect me to be a regular tyrant (aint yer fritend).

It is now nine o’clock love + I have not had any tea, I am sure you will excuse more from me in that case.

I remain always
Your loving true + faithful husband
Fred

P.S. You must prepare yourself for a severe kissing darling

That’s the last letter I have before their reunion. Once again my window into Fred and Janie’s world goes dark as the letters obviously stop during his visit to Sheffield. They start up again after his journey back and so next week we’ll find out how they are both coping with being parted once again, and also discover that our Emma has been stealing something precious from Janie. 

[outro]
Thank you so much for listening to My Love Letter Time Machine. I’d very much like to share Fred and Janie’s story with more people, so If you haven’t already - can I ask to share this podcast with someone you think might enjoy it? You can also find excerpts of Fred and Janie’s letters on instagram at my love letter time machine all one word and you can write to me at my love letter time machine at gmail dot com.

Until next time, take care.
© Ingrid Birchell Hughes 2022